For Such A Time As This...

our friend Kak Hewa, standing next to his daughter at her wedding only 4 months ago...

i will never forget October 22 at 2:37 a.m. i will never forget the sound of tapping on my bedroom window. i will never forget the sweet tear streaked face that lo

oked at me through the window and cried, "my daddy is died! my daddy is died!" i will never forget running out into the darkness of the night to sit with my dearest friend here as the reality that her husband would never come home sunk in. She went thr

ough rage, terror, sorrow, wailing, chanting, and complete stillness. She has bruises on her legs now from where she slapped them in utter disbelief in the middle of the night. as the night turned to dawn we learned more of the details of Kak Hewa's tragic death. He

was returning home from work and fell asleep at the wheel...his car flipped many times and his body was badly mangled. He died shortly thereafter. The only hope i can grasp at is that he made peace with the Maker before he took his last breath.

precious Lavine who will never know her "Baba"

my strong and dear friend and now widow Nazeela

my sweet Zeelan who came to tell me that night...

Aram...3 years old and FULL of life

Now we are left in the wreckage of this family. one wife, Nazeela, and 6 children. One daughter is married...an earlier blog from June...Leila (18)...one daughter was born only 4 months ago...Lavine...the one i got to be there for. One daughter, Zeelan (12), is one of Annie's sweetest friends here. Aram is 3 and still waiting to be healed from the deformity he was given at birth by an impatient doctor who yanked him from the birth canal. Azad, the eldest son, at 20 has now become the family head. And finally, Hevi...who has been estranged from the family for many years and lives in another country.

We are so thankful that we get to be here for such a time as this...and yet utterly incapable of making sense of it. But we know that we are here to rejoice with this family when they rejoiced at the wedding and birth and now we are here to mourn with this family as they mourn the loss of their beloved father!

we are also here to be the hands of the One who loves them more than we do. I read a quote my Thomas Edison this week and it has helped me move forward, "Opportunity is missed by most people because it comes dressed in overalls and looks like work!" This is our opportunity! So we rolled up our sleeves and have worked with great abandon and joy to love this family!

For 3 days the family went to a local mosque and mourned. Which meant we sat and cried a lot. we also ate together. Kids ran around while women sat in a room, mostly sullen, but occasionally bursting out in tears afresh. Occasionally wailing and screaming! it was heart-wrenching and exhausting. The men sat in their own room. The burial happened right away. It was a process i won't soon forget. It was raw and very real. We watched the men dig the grave. we saw the body in a simple bag and covered in a blanket. We watched as they dumped the earth on top of him and we held our friends as they cried and screamed and could not make sense of this. on the 3rd day we traveled back to the grave and we watched as the women threw themselves on the grave and threw the dirt on themselves. Our hearts wrenched within us as they screamed out.

Now we are back in our own homes...but the opportunity still abounds as it is our duty as their neighbors to make sure that every need is cared for.

the women did not waste any time setting up shop in our upstairs neighbor's porch. Bevin has graciously opened her heart and home to all the women. So we helped as we could cutting vegetables, washing dishes, serving the men (who sit on their keisters all day...but that's another blog)
Bevin and I with Haleem ( a sweet cousin of Leila's by marriage) that has worked tirelessly and been at Leila's side to comfort and see to her every need. Here we are working on cutting chives. all the cooking has been done outside in large pots sitting on top of stands attached to propane tanks. all cutting and washing has been done in this position...the squat! even the oldest women can squat for 30 minutes without having to shift. it's amazing...i lasted for about 5 minutes before my legs were screaming for me to stand.

oh yes...here are the men as mentioned before...sitting.

sitting some more...

oh and here they are....SITTING!!

the visitors have dwindled from dozens to 20 to 10 or so now. At one point, we counted 4 different nationalities sitting together around the tablecloth spread out to contain all the food for us.

and now we are faced with many questions...i look into the vacant eyes of Nazeela and my tongue still cannot form all the words i want to say. just last week i wrote in my journal that she was ready to receive and now this and now it's too late for Kak Hewa. but i believe with all my heart that this is the catalyst to bring the rest of the family and neighbors and anyone else that will get caught up in this net to be brought into the Family. TO BE CONTINUED...

Pumpkin Cookies

Lest you feel bad for us...we still can enjoy a lot of the same traditions we did back in the States! one of our favorite traditions that my mom brought me up on is decorating cookies! not a holiday goes by that we don't make cookies and frost them and of course eat them! it welcomes in the holiday! traditions are so important to me! so my pumpkin cookie cutter came all the way and has made several batches of cookies for the fall! annie of course is very serious about her work on the pumpkin.
toby just wants to quickly get it done and eat it up as fast as he can...
while jesse wants to make sure he has the biggest cookie with the most frosting on it...
i like mine just right...and all of us happy and smiling...oh yes and if you know me, you know that it's a controlled environment as well...to make the least amount of mess! it's way more fun for ME that way! Happy Fall!

First Day of Kurdish School

so our plan all along has been to one day get Annie into school here. However we did not want to rush her. so we thought we would take a year and try next fall. She was NOT wanting to go. but everyone that we knew wanted her to go! So we talked about it a few times, but every time she was VERY scared about it. so we dropped it. then one day as we are driving in town we saw a little girl in a uniform much like this one and i casually said, "won't it be fun next year when you wear a cute uniform like that?" and annie says with mounting excitment, "i get to get a uniform when i go to school?!" so i said, "yes" and she decided right then she wanted to get into school as soon as possible. i should have known it was all about the outfit with my girl!
so we prayed about it and decided that if we could get her into the school her neighborhood friends go to and if she could only go 3 afternoons a week, instead of what they do, 3 mornings a week and 3 afternoons a week...then we would go for it. so we visited "Mulee Gowra" and got it all squared away. So she started on Saturday. She will go Saturday, Sunday and Monday. She leaves the house just after lunch around 12:15 and gets home around 4:45. it's a LONG afternoon for her, especially on Sunday and Monday after doing homeschool with me all morning. But she said she was up for the challenge. We found out she cannot have nail polish on her fingernails and her hair must be all back.
here she is with her friends on their way to school. the first graders have not been given their new purple plaid uniforms yet, so annie is borrowing one of her friends' old uniforms until she gets her own.
here she is walking down the street for her first big day. she held Reggine's hand the whole way. the school is about a half mile away...almost a straight shot.
for the first day, i stayed with annie the entire time. here she is with the rest of the 1st grade class. all of these kids with her are 6 as well, but she stands head and shoulders above them and looks so much older. but she didn't seem to notice or care.
on saturdays they have a flag ceremony. all the classes line up in this courtyard...annie's class is on the far right facing forward. you can see the P.E. teacher if you look closely...wearing a head scarf...just thought that was funny. 3 girls march out to the flag, salute, stamp their feet and then raise the flag. then the entire school sings a song...maybe some kind of anthem...not sure yet.
annie wasted no time raising her hand and getting into the thick of things. here she is with her "AlephBet Mamousta" her Kurdish Teacher, who annie is almost as tall as. she is a sweet lady and a great teacher, very kind and patient and loving to all the kids. annie got up and read her first two Kurdish words in front of the entire class. they are all learning still. she read "DAR" which means tree! I was so proud.
she sits in the front row with "Shana"...they are all two to a desk, just like the early 1900's for us.
here she is with her teacher. her teacher says annie is doing so great and she hopes annie will teach her English!
here is the entire class...bare concrete floors and a few fake flowers taped to the wall. it was dreadfully hot inside and it's bring your own supplies. some kids had little nubs for pencils. the entire process was very slow. the teacher went through and wrote in all 34 children's notebooks the letters they should copy. that was it...no frills, bells or whistles....just rote memorization. but the teacher did have a few songs and a few stretching activities in the middle of the lesson to help get out wigglies. she also had a math lesson and an art lesson. the art lesson could be an whole other blog. the teacher that walked in...i was too afraid to take her picture...was wearing a button up shirt all the way buttoned up to her neck with a headscarf and long skirt. she walked in and did not say a word. she carried a dry erase marker and a ruler. the kids got out their drawing pads and then the teacher drew a bizarre looking butterfly on the board and an orange. then the kids started drawing. some drew what she drew and others did not. she gave no instruction. but then the teacher went to the back of the class and perched on the edge of a desk and every few minutes would whack the desk with her ruler if it got to chattery! after a while the kids brought their notebooks to the teacher to have her look them over. she would then scrawl something over their drawing...a grade? annie took hers and got "10/10 thank you" in english! but the teacher did not look at her or me and did not smile. then the kids started getting restless and she started pushing them away when they brought her their notebooks. then the kids started talking more and then the ruler starting coming down on hands, arms, and backs of heads. i was freaking out...planning my move for if she dared touch annie with that ruler. i was thinking rip the ruler out of hand and tackle her to the ground and give her a good whack or two. she did not touch annie though, but i went to annie and told her to sit forward and not talk. annie was not scared of her and neither were the other kids, even the ones that were being hit. it was really weird. the teacher had absolutely no control, but she wouldn't even talk. so as i have talked to other teachers, they have said, she will not hit annie and that this teacher is not right in the head. i observed her again today and watched her talking to herself a little. the other teachers say she never talks to anyone and never eats or drinks. not sure how this person got to be a teacher...but apparently the PTA is not super strong around here. =) at first i did not really like her, but now i realize that she has probably been beaten herself and probably does have some kind of mental disorder as a result or even something more. at any rate, we are going to love her!

i realize this was a dreadfully long blog...but this was a pretty big event! annie is now THE most popular kid in her school. today before school she was a little nervous and she prayed that she wouldn't be mobbed by all the kids, since they all follow her around at recess and shout things like, "what's your name" in english at her. it's quite overwhelming! so today one of the teachers shooed everyone off and she came home and that was the first thing she told us, "J answered my prayers!" we are so proud of her...although i admit i missed her dreadfully this afternoon and thought about her the entire time. i couldn't resist checking in on her halfway too. she was doing great!

An exquisite and elaborate tea party...

my loving and oh so wonderful mother decided it would be grand to send her only granddaughter a book on tea parties. oh not just any tea parties though...ones with suggestions on how to fold napkins and invitations and on and on... i saw it and thought...oh gee...thanks a lot mom! way to heap on the work! but of course annie saw it and loved it. begged me for a couple of weeks to do a tea party called, "in celebration of Little Women..." so i finally sat down and looked it over with her and thought...oh fine! so annie came up with the list of who she wanted to invite and then designed the invitations herself. requesting my help for the cursive that had to be done! then we hand delivered them. then we prepared ourselves for the big day. we made pink lemonade from hand squeezed lemons, petit-fours (which only took an entire bag of powdered sugar which is really hard to come by here and only took about 3 hours in the kitchen), we also made ice cream snowballs...however when you are in iraq...you might have an unexpected power outage resulting in more of a pancake than a ball...but you know you roll with the punches.
but we managed to pull it all together in time for the guests to arrive. we had a mixed crowd of Kurdish women and American women. it was a little awkward, but it was really fun. we had a interesting "discussion" on our favorite books, which i realized as i was asking the question that some of our guests are illiterate...so i was able to quickly add or your favorite film! at any rate it was a great opportunity to discuss my favorite Book! then at the end we gave out little books that are in Kurdish and English with Annie's and my favorite Story.
annie and sweet friend Zeelan! Zeelan is wearing a necklace annie made for her!

The book itself will hopefully remain buried in the book basket for a couple months...while it was fun, it was a lot of work. of course i will be sure to find it and suggest that Annie and her Mimi (my mom) put on a tea party together whenever she comes for a visit! ah...revenge!

One Last Hoorah!

we decided to make one last swimming trip to the lake, before it gets too cold. the wind was a little chilly and we all had blue lips afterwards, but it was worth it and we swam all day. it was wonderful. all the foreigners from our town went! what a wonderful time!
the beach is a little rocky, but tim doesn't mind, he is sleeping anyway!
annie, my little explorer hiked up the rocks barefooted with no problem. she was also swimming out really far!
after we came back, the kids and I hiked this little mountain ridge!
the day wouldn't be complete without a movie in the car and an ice cream to round it all off! we are happy to say we survived summer in Iraq!

Mountain Top Experiences...

we have seen the temperature change...but we don't have leaves changing...so fall will be hard for us. we will miss all the things we LOVE about fall in the U.S. but we do have lots of changes going on with our team. We took a trip to the top of our mountain. the kids played in the old forts while we talked to our Father.
here's the adults.
here's the queen of the mountain...what a get up! turquoise crocs, stripy leggings and a dress from the boutique from mimi! she also added a headband with another print on it! wow! watch out fashion world!
my little prisoners...
this is the whole team now: me, Laura, Carol, Erin, Elijah, Jesse, Paul, Toby, Annie, little Jesse, and Tim. it's great to have some fresh people ready to teach at our center! So we are excited for what changes this season will bring!

Our Roomies...

introducing Laura and Carol...they now live downstairs in our little "apartment"...they might like to stress the word little and they are trying to work with the space to make it home for the next couple of months. annie seems to think they moved in just to be near her and do crafts with her.
here is there living area/kitchennette/dining room. taken from the front door. there is a big window behind me too.
this is there little bedroom....they get to share a bed! but they are doing a great job of having a good attitude about that!
here's the little bathroom that is under our stairs! that completes the tour, as soon as we get them kicked out and into their own place...you all can come for a visit! =)

Rain, Rain, Rain...Keep Coming!

so it sprinkled one time since we have been here...5 months now...almost to the day! about a week shy of that now! but it rained again the day after we got back from our weekend getaway. it was so perfect and wonderful. it drizzled on and off all day and then came down pretty heavy that night. with it...was a cool front. it has officially cooled us off and held us cool. it has been amazing! the kids are so excited about getting to wear pants and long sleeves. although most days still get up into the 80's and 90's...it still feels amazing to us and we are so thankful! at night it cools down into the 60's. the rain gave us an excuse to dig through a trunk and find our beloved boots and umbrellas. we were so thankful we made space for those as well!
although it took jesse awhile to go out into the rain! but he had the gear!
he finally made it out and annie was able to stop running around in pure glee for a minute so i could snap a pic of her! hopefully we get more rain soon!

a few more pics...

between internet and life...i haven't been able to post some more pics i wanted to share from our weekend away. here's one of all the rugrats...3 of the ray kids and our 3! they are all the same age...by a few months. they had a lot of fun together.
okay...this was amazing. our family set off to explore one afternoon and as we were driving we see horses running down a mountainside. okay...not all that exciting in america, but here the only animals we have seen are donkeys and cows! so this was super exciting! so we are wondering who owns horses, but suddenly the horses are running across the road and we realize they do not belong to anyone, they are wild. i got a lot of pictures, but i thought this one was pretty contrasting with the mosque in the background.
we also discovered a great waterfall...although great is not the best word to describe it since it is the one place that tourists...who knew there were tourists in iraq...flock to. so it was strange because there was a bazaar all built up around the waterfall, so you couldn't actually see the waterfall, but you could buy all sorts of junk! this is annie with some random man that grabbed her and wanted a pic with her. this sort of thing happens often. usually it is with the boys though. but the boys had both just fallen on the exact same slippery spot and were crying and tim was mad and i was mad at tim and annie somehow got grabbed in the madness....you can imagine.
we did manage to find some $2 hats that seemed irresistible and if these buildings weren't here, you could see the waterfall...
later i captured this new fav pic of toby giving me a miniscule flower! i love that sweet part of his heart. this week he has asked twice now about heaven. today after having a hard day and just now falling down in the mud...while i was showering him he said, "don't you just wish you could go to heaven." i said, "yep...but for now we will just do a good job here." and he said, "after iraq...HEAVEN!" what a great perspective!